Here are a few tidbits accumulated during sixteen hours on my feet yesterday. Some of the comments could be considered electioneering, which is illegal, but whatever. I guess people don't really care about that.
"I would never vote for a woman for president. You may feel differently, but I never would. Never. Women are too emotional. They can't run this country. This country needs a man in charge."
So . . . did you vote for Hillary, or not?
"Oooohhhh, I would have been in trouble if I didn't come down here and vote for Mitt Romney today. He's my cousin!"
"Help me out, here. I've never used a computer before. I'm like a first grader."
Actually, ma'am, there are very few first graders who aren't completely comfortable with a computer. And this is a touch screen. It's not really what most people think of when they think "computer."
"Where's the tool to punch in my votes?"
It's a touch screen. There's no tool.
"What is this? I don't see one person on here I'd want to vote for."
You and me both, sister.
"Hey, I like this new computer voting. Isn't it amazing what they can do? This is great!"
That's exactly, word for word, what you said the last time you voted, sir. And the time before that.
"I know you haven't had any other Democrats here today, but I'm here now." And to me she whispered, "I'm glad there are the two of us, at least."
And my personal favorite:
Poll worker: I'm sorry ma'am. This is a closed election. As a Constitution Party member, you won't be able to vote today.
Voter: WHAT?!?! But I'm here to vote for Ron Paul!!
Poll worker motions to me to come over and solve this. Briefly explains situation to me.
Me: Are you registered to vote, ma'am?
Voter: Yes, I am. I'm here to vote for Ron Paul.
Me: Are you a registered Republican?
Voter: I was, but I changed because of what George W. Bush is doing to this country.
Me: So you're registered with the Constitution Party?
Voter: Yes, but I'm a huge Ron Paul supporter. I've worked really hard for his campaign.
Were you the one who placed an illegal sign on the grounds of the school this morning?
Me: I understand, but Constitution Party members are not able to vote today, since it's a closed election.
Voter: Well then, how am I supposed to vote for Ron Paul?
Yikes! I have to shut this woman up!
Me: You won't be able to vote for that candidate today. I'm sorry.
Voter: Well. I hope you ladies know what George Bush is doing to this country. Do you know? He supports a movement to merge this country with Mexico! A North American Alliance! That's treason!!
Me: Well, we're not really able to discuss that here, actually.
Voter: Well. I hope you are telling people about it. I hope you know about it. The things he's doing . . . THAT's why I want to vote for Ron Paul.
Me: Okay, well, I'm sorry--again--that you won't be able to vote today. Thanks for coming.
Some people were angry because they had to wait in line for half an hour to vote. I found it interesting that they could really get worked up about taking thirty minutes out of their time to exercise their rights at the polls. People in other locations had to wait two hours! Good thing those people weren't born in Africa. I guess Americans are just busier people.
Others were angry because it was a closed election, and they didn't get a chance to try and cut out the other party's favorite candidate. I'm pretty sure that's why it was a closed election. Republicans can only vote Republican, etc. Although the Dems were generous enough to let all the unaffiliated voters vote on their ticket, which basically doesn't mean anything in this state anyway.The only voter I really missed seeing was the tatooed guy in the sleeveless sweatshirt who told me last year that he wanted to dress Osama Bin Laden up in a really nice suit. I can't remember why, but the name of Bill Clinton came up, as well as the term "firing squad." I think he may have even had Osama firing at Clinton.
Funniest voter award goes to my friend Gary, who, on his way over to the machine, whispered to me, "How do you spell 'Perot'?" I guess he changed his mind, because we didn't end up with any write-in candidates. Too bad, really.
8 comments:
I wish you were my poll worker! I was disenfranchised!!! The county didn't process my application in a timely manner (or they neglected to teach the poll workers how to look on the computer and see if I was registered. Either way...) so I was left to fill out a provisional ballot. I was pretty irate, because with my ballot not counted on election night, John McCain only got 16 votes in Utah instead of 17.
When I read about you thanking the Crazy, Ron Paul lover, I laughed hard and loud.
i've been surprised to hear about places where people had to wait to vote. i just walked in, asked for the Democratic ballot, cast my vote for Hillary Clinton, and walked out. i guess there aren't that many people in my area who care about politics. i'm quite certain there were only two votes for Hillary in my area - mine and WhiteRabbit's (and i think he only voted for Hillary because he thought i was voting for Obama and wanted to cancel out my vote).
Oh, I was hoping you'd have some good tidbits from election day. You didn't disappoint.
Cicada read this aloud to me while I painted the other night, even AFTER we had hard the story from you in person. I laughed a lot. Very insightful and funny.
Great read, thanks for sharing your experience.
I don't think you need to be so hard on the people that were upset about waiting. If the Elections Board had thought about it more carefully and set up more polling places (mine had three precincts glommed together), the operation would have been a lot more efficient.
I guess my point, which I didn't make very well, was that at our location, no one had to wait more than twenty-five minutes. And they were still mad. Even when we told them that some locations had a much longer wait. And I think Utah County has wisely decided to open more locations for next time.
Also, they didn't publicize the locations well, so some people had to go to two or three places before they could actually vote. Most of them were pretty cheerful about it, but we got to take some flak from a few. That would have been frustrating. I just can't see getting worked up at your poll workers because you had to wait in line for twenty minutes.
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I want to help at the polls someday.
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I had a chance to help with the polls this year and do a sociology study at the same time. But I had to work.
Suck.
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