Why I Said the Word of D--- Two Times In My Head on Wednesday

Wednesday morning was the day the youth were leaving on their pioneer trek. Busboy was due to be gone for four days. Not that I don't love Busboy, and not that he's a pain when he's around, but I am accustomed to having the entire house to myself for six hours every day. When school lets out for the summer, I am rarely treated to any silent alone time, and it wears on me. It wears on me starting about Day 1. So minus one kid is a bonus for me, even when that kid doesn't normally bug me too much. Teenagers just take up a lot of emotional space, and there's no other way to say it.

So imagine my disappointment when Busboy walked in about two hours after the buses had supposedly left for Wyoming.

"What happened?" I said calmly, hoping that the buses were late and he was just back to retrieve a forgotten item.

"Oh, they cancelled it because it's snowing up there and a lot of the kids weren't prepared for that kind of weather," he said.

Note: The night before, BB was refusing to take his winter coat, because he didn't think he'd need it. I intervened and forcefully insisted that he take it. So HE was prepared, even if some of the other kids weren't.

Anyway, that's when I said the word of "D---" in my head.

Later I took Lola to the dentist, where we were both going to have a couple of fillings put in. These are Lola's first cavities. Lola has a very low pain tolerance. I wasn't too worried about her though, as Twenty-First Century Dentists have new, practically painless methods for anaesthetizing and doing their thing.

After the dentist was through with us, Lola walked out and spat generously on the sidewalk. After I used some garbled disciplinary words to the effect of, "That's disgusting and unnecessary," Lola began to cry. She continue to cry (and scream) for about an hour. The shot had hurt real bad. Her jaw hurt real bad. She felt like she was going to throw up. She was starving and unable to eat until the numbness wore off. The list went on. I myself was not so much in the mood to listen to this. My dental work had taken an hour and a half, and my jaw had been pried wide open the entire time. I wasn't feeling so great, and by the way, Lola's had taken thirty minutes from start to finish.

That's when I said the word of "D---" in my head the second time.

Later the mail came, including report cards. Both Lola and Busboy received mostly good grades--nothing to complain about there, but the high school also enclosed a bill for $1000 for a laptop computer that Busboy had checked out during the school year. Due on or before June 14.

"Huh?" I said.

That night, when we questioned Busboy about it, he searched back in his memory and remembered that "Oh yeah, that was stolen like two weeks before school was out." I guess he forgot to mention it to us. His brilliant plan was to pay for it secretly by taking the money out of his mission savings and try to replace it over the summer--and to take less money on his mission and eat ramen instead of real food. I guess he didn't count on them sending the bill to us.

Then the email indicated that a fellow PTA member had purchased me a $57.25 ticket to a musical that I did not request, and that I am not able to pay for. She wants to be reimbursed as soon as possible. (We are going to National PTA Convention in St. Louis in a few weeks, and big plans are being made for after-hours activities.)

Then I went to band rehearsal and was insulted by a fellow flautist.

Then I had to drop my car off at the shop for $500 worth of repairs.

Unfortunately, I had used up all my swears after the dentist, so I had no recourse for any of this stuff. And really, considering the laptop, all the other insults sort of paled in comparison. I sure wished I had saved up for that one. I could have used two D---s on that one alone.

Naturally all this calls to mind that Margaret Mitchell classic. "Tomorrow is another day," and at that point, I'll have two more swears, and won't be forced to say, "Frankly, daltonboy, I don't have a damn."