After midnight . . .

Last night was the final night of the Legislative session, and I stayed until the bitter end. And I do mean bitter. At midnight the legislators all got up from their desks and clapped and cheered. In the gallery and hallways, some people cried. The sweet woman next to me was a mess. I think maybe she was new to this. I tried to comfort her with the thought that her bill will come back next year, and it will breeze right through, since it was very close to the end anyway. I'm not sure if she heard me or not.

One of the highlights for me was when Rod Decker and his crew set up their news equipment right over my head (like, practically resting on my head), and I got to watch Rod lick his fingers and smooth his hair out in the reflection of the lens for about twenty minutes. Then I was practically on TV when he did his report, since I was part of the tripod and all.

Anyway, I got to bed about 2:00 a.m., and this morning I am going to write very nice, diplomatic letters to my legislators, thanking them for their hard work and generous public service. Before I do that, though, I have a couple of things to get off my chest. So here are the letters I wish I could write.

To My Senator

Dear Senator:

Thank you very much for representing me and my neighbors in the 2006 Legislative Session. I use the term "represent" loosely.

As I watched you during the session, I cast my mind back to a meeting that you and I were in together, wherein you told fifty or so assembled PTA members how much you love PTA, how you used to be a PTA president yourself, how your heart is always with PTA, and how your top (as in Number One) priority is education. Blah, blah, blah. I admit to you now that your voice sounded oily to me at the time. Later I heard from a friend who was in a meeting with you and her fellow transportation lobbyists that you told them transportation was your top (as in Number One) priority. Forgive my cynicism, but I wondered how a person can have two top priorities. Not having a lot of close friends in other lobbying groups, I haven't been able to collect data on what you've told them. The initial evidence seems incriminating though.

Over the last forty-five days, you helped vote down bills that would protect children, provide better education, and serve at-risk families. With my own ears I heard you say that since there were two seat belt bills (addressing different aspects of the law), you would only be able to vote for one of them. Sure, one of them made the other unnecessary, but you didn't know which one would pass. If you agreed with the concept, wouldn't the safe route have been to vote for them both? I am not a greasy politician, so I don't have the answer. I'm just wondering.

When we presented you with carefully researched arguments on one bill, begging you to reconsider and support it, you ignored our requests. Fortunately, reason prevailed with the majority of the body, and we got what our schools needed in that case. We weren't so lucky in others.

So thanks again. For almost nothing. It must be nice to know that you're in a position of power, and so thoroughly entrenched that you don't have to listen to your constituents.

You do have a very lovely speaking voice, and I enjoyed listening to the sound of it throughout the session. Since I am trying to end on a positive note, I'll just leave it at that.

Sincerely,
Daltongirl


To My Representative

Dear Representative:

You are an idiot.

Sincerely,
Daltongirl

p.s. I'm sorry that as a disgruntled employee you feel it necessary to wreak havoc on the entire educational system. Party caucuses are March 21. Rest assured that I will attend mine, and will spend the next year doing everything in my power to insure that you will not be returning to the House next January, except for tearing down the huge sign you put up in my party-line neighbor's yard every election year. I will not stoop to illegal or irresponsible actions, because I am above that. You, apparently, are not.