I'm a little bit confused about how to act right now. I mean, does it seem right to sit around living normal life, laughing and joking, playing, shopping, getting upset about gas prices, and writing/thinking/obsessing about my insignificant life, when thousands of people are homeless, hungry, frightened, or worse?
On the other hand, just what am I supposed to do? I can't fly to Mississippi and help. I have no skills, except compassion, and maybe Band-Aid application, and I have no money. Except for what I need to bid on all the stuff I keep buying on eBay. I listen to the news, keep informed, pray, and I'm grateful it's not me. But I can't sit around all day long mourning, nor should I. Right? Or wrong? Is it wrong?
And is it sick to think about how glad I am that I got to see New Orleans last fall before it was destroyed? I am, but the city isn't really what's important. In fact, after going there, I tend to think there was a pretty good reason it got wiped out. As daltonboy said, "I hope the Hustler Club was a total loss." But there was so much beauty too, and history, and there were living people.
I went through this same thing with 9-11. After about a week, I was completely exhausted with crying every time I saw a flag. Also I was desensitized by that repeated (ad nauseum) image of the buildings.
Then there's the issue of scaring the kids. If we talk about it too much, certain red-headed stepchildren start to get freaked out. Because what if we have a hurricane here? Or an earthquake. What about an earthquake? Or a tornado? It escalates from there.
What if I had a loved one that lived in that area? My concern would certainly increase. When I think about that, I start to feel more guilty, like what kind of monster am I to only care about people who are close to me? Every member of the human race deserves my compassion. Not just the ones I know.
Probably I'm normal. But I want to be good. I want to be engaged. I want to have true compassion for all God's children. I want to look for needs and jump up and serve them. I want to do something. It's just so hard not to get distracted when there's a good movie playing, or a sale on, or when I have a headache.
4 comments:
I know how you feel---and I'm particularly at a loss as to what to do since they're all coming HERE to Houston. Our leaders have stressed to not just up and run down to the Astrodome and help, but to contribute to organized relief efforts (i.e. the Church, etc.) I actually called the Red Cross to see if they needed help sheltering people; we have two completely empty bedrooms. They're all bogged up with messages, though, so a lot of good that did. It's crazy, though, to watch on the news and see everything that's going on. I mean, people are dying in the Superdome and no one can really do anything about it. They're sitting amongst garbage and human waste, it's hot and they're starving . . . it's just almost too much. I keep thinking it can't get worse and it does.
So, um, yeah, I know what you're saying. I wish I knew how to help more.
Great post; good thoughts. It's one of those posts that I don't really know what to say to respond because it makes me feel bad about my own apathy. I'm sitting here complaining about classes and work on no sleep, when there are people who have lost all of their possessions or are being assaulted by looters. Kind of makes me feel pretty weak that I'm not doing anything about it, but like you said, what can I do? I guess just sit here in my comfy office chair making 8 bucks an hour, go get my thousands-of-dollars-worth of education, and then go home to my well-air-conditioned apartment and my beautiful family.
If nothing else, thinking of these tragedies sure makes me more grateful.
I made a couple of hats yesterday, so now I feel better. Not that any of the hurricane victim will get use out of them, but someone, somewhere will.
For some reason, it helps to cry a little. I guess that is an outward sign that one really cares. Not that you don't care if you don't cry, but this morning as I was listening to NPR, I just started crying, hearing the stories of people who were experiencing such horrors. I felt a little better after that, like maybe I'm not shallow after all. Maybe it's the confirmation that we still feel that makes it seem better. We are so desensitized by the media. I worry that it's affected me to the point that I don't notice true human suffering.
And gratitude is good. It's even great. If I can turn off my constant train of "I want this, I need this," thoughts for a while, and focus on appreciating all I already have, I think that's fabulous.
I'm in the same boat. I feel like there isn't much that any of us can do so the only thing to do is keep living. Some of the people I work with are outraged about the situation but, at the same time, don't seem to be doing anything...
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